Blog Envy

7:25 AM

I've always been an avid blog reader, looking for ideas and outlooks on life.
Pretty general I know
But what makes my blog different from there's?
For the past couple years, after numerous blogs have been deleted and re-created, I still haven't found an answer to this solution. Some blogs have a set goal at the beginning. There title tells you everything from purpose to the (hopeful) end result. Think of it like a science experiment in a way. For me, I decided to go in the opposite direction. Write what I know. Lately though, I haven't found the words or even the thoughts to transcribe correctly what I know. Maybe it's the college classes I'm taking right now that's affecting my judgment or skew on things in life. Maybe, I've always had these thoughts in my head but have never truly acknowledge them. I guess it's up to debate. I only know what I know (that sounds redundant, doesn't it?!?) based off of what others have told me is correct or incorrect. I guess you could say that I've been having an epiphany of sorts, a self-revelation. I'm realizing that I know what others have told me, but I haven't truly come to terms with how it has impacted me as a person.

And then the question of how does this impact my blog comes into play

If I want to impact others (persons) I need to know more about myself. How can this be achieved? How do I know that others, that have created an impact, know fully about themselves as people? I really don't. So maybe this is only me expressing my self-doubt and realizing how vain this blog is. I want to create an impact or have an impact. I want to be able to show that I am not the only one that has self-doubts but also has other sorts of emotions. Really, how many blogs does one need to see what is the latest and greatest fashion trend. Don't get me wrong, I love fashion and all that. There's a reason why I work in the industry I do. But I also love news. I guess that's why I made this blog into a collection of things because I wanted to show you guys how you don't have to have only one thing to be passionate about. You can have multiple. This blog isn't supposed to be me saying goodbye. I'm just telling you were I am in life. To be honest, I'm burnt out. I have all these ideas, all this energy (or had) but seem like I'm short-ended with it. I see all these amazing people in my life achieving their dreams and making an impact and wondering, with envy, when my time is going to come. Or better yet, if it will ever.

Now I'm not asking for pity. This blog has enough vain aspects about myself as it is. I'm asking you to understand and possibly guide me in the right direction for this blog. Assistance. I want to be able to help people. I want to be able to uplift, even if it is for only one person.

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